Freak Files: Friday, 5/1/15

If You’re Missing a Tooth, Get It Replaced With a Bottle Opener?

Some rugby players in Argentina have started replacing their missing teeth with BOTTLE OPENERS.

The bottle opener is shaped like a tooth . . . and a dental surgeon implants it by drilling into your gum and anchoring it to your jawbone. Which sounds INCREDIBLY painful . . . but just think how cool you’ll be at parties!

We couldn’t find any dentists in America who are offering the service, so you basically have two options if you want one: Go to Argentina . . . or pay a lot of money to a dentist here who works in the back room of a Chinese restaurant.


Screen Shot 2015-05-01 at 5.05.46 AMA Shoplifter Was Busted Shoving Meat and Bleach Down Her Pants

48-year-old Doris Rowe of Mount Dora, Florida went to a Winn-Dixie grocery store about 26 miles from her house on Tuesday afternoon . . . and went on a shoplifting spree.

She started shoving stuff down her pants, then got out of there . . . but not before a manager spotted her. He followed her out to her car, where he watched her pull a tremendous number of things out of her pants.

Her total haul was: Five ribeye steaks . . . six pounds of ground beef . . . four packs of bacon . . . two packs of pork ribs . . . and a gallon of BLEACH.

She was arrested for grand theft and robbery. **STUPID CRIMINALS***

A 54-year-old guy named Kenneth Edwards was driving the getaway car, and he was charged too.


A 73-Year-Old Punched a Bear in the Face to Save His Dog

A 73-year-old named Carl Moore was at his house near Sacramento, California last month, when he heard his Chihuahua Lacy outside whimpering. So he went to check it out . . . and saw a BLACK BEAR standing in his backyard about to eat Lacy.

Now, I’m not sure what I’d do in that situation. But Carl immediately threw his hands in the air and started screaming at the bear to scare it away.

When that didn’t work, he ran straight at it . . . and punched it in the FACE.

Somehow that DID work. The bear ran off, and Carl and Lacy are both fine. One of his friends was there when it happened, and says it was crazy to watch .

Carl told the local news that he’s never run from anything in his life, and he wasn’t about to start now, just because of a stupid bear.

He also said that if the bear ever comes back, he’s ready for round two.


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Freak Files: Thursday, 4/30/15

False Alarm!!

A silent alarm went off in Mitchell, South Dakota, signaling that a bank robbery was in progress.

A full tactical unit was dispatched to First Dakota National Bank. When police arrived, they found a student tour being given at the bank. Yes, a field trip, not a bank robbery!!

One of the students had allegedly set off the silent alarm alerting police. The students were very amused by the whole thing, the police, not so much.


Your Sleeve Tattoo Could Prevent Your Apple Watch From Working

When you were getting your cool sleeve tattoo, you knew it might cause a problem or two getting a job, but you NEVER thought it would cause a problem with your beloved gadgets.

Apparently some people are finding that their sleeve tattoos are causing problems with the new Apple Watch. The watch checks your heart rate to tell whether you’re wearing it . . . it flashes infrared lights at your skin, and uses them to gauge your heart rate.

And if it doesn’t detect a pulse, a lot of its features stop working, like getting notifications, taking phone calls, or using Apple Pay. But it looks like having tattoos on your wrist could screw up the censor and keep the watch from detecting your pulse . . . especially black, green, and red tattoos.

There’s no word yet from Apple on whether they’re developing a fix.


H&M Made a T-shirt That Misspelled “Genius”

This is just too perfect.

H&M recently started selling a t-shirt that features a famous THOMAS EDISON quote: “Genius is 1% inspiration and 99% perspiration.” There’s just one problem.

They spelled genius “g-e-n-i-o-u-s.” If you’re hip to spelling then you know that “o” ain’t supposed to be there. Once someone online pointed it out, they pulled the shirt. But so far, they haven’t commented on the mistake.

Click here to see a picture.

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Freak Files: Wednesday, 4/29/15

Update on Dude That Stabbed His Coworker Over Onion Rings:

Remember the guy in England who stabbed his coworker with a fork for eating his onion rings back in December? Well, he won’t go to jail for it, as long as he stays out of trouble. A judge gave him one year of probation on Monday.


A Woman Is Fired From Her Daycare Job Before Her First Day For Posting on Facebook That She Hates Being Around Kids

One day, people are going to learn that posting something publicly on Facebook means that, gasp, people can see it.

27-year-old Kaitlyn Walls is from Dallas, Texas. Earlier this month, she got a job working at a daycare. But the morning before she started, she posted on Facebook, quote, “I start my new job today, but I absolutely hate working at daycare.”

Her new bosses saw it . . . and FIRED her before she could even start. Then a mob of angry mothers on Facebook found out what she’d written and started attacking her, so she tried to clarify, quote, “Lol, it’s all good, I just really hate being around a lot of kids.” That’s really not an improvement . . . it might actually be worse.

Kaitlyn now realizes that if she DOES have issues, she’s not going to put them on Facebook.


Two Guys Steal 80 Frozen Pizzas . . . Then Get Caught Trying to Sell Them to Cops

Two guys in Alaska committed a PIZZA HEIST this weekend . . . but they learned the hard way that’s a harder road to profit than they realized.

29-year-old John Koozaata and 21-year-old Lewis Oozeva of Gambell, Alaska, broke into a warehouse where they stole 80 frozen pizzas, worth about $1,100 total.

They gorged on them . . . but once they were full, they still had a bunch left over. So they decided to sell them, and for some inexplicable reason, they called the POLICE DEPARTMENT and offered to sell them to the cops on duty. But unfortunately, the cops knew about the missing pizzas . . . so both guys were arrested for burglary.

Stupid Criminals!!!


Three Teenage Burglars Think Cremated Ashes Are Cocaine . . . and Snort Them

Three teenagers broke into a house in St. Peters, Missouri back in November, and stole cash, jewelry, electronics, and a wooden box full of cocaine.

Well . . . at least they THOUGHT it was cocaine until they SNORTED some, and tasted it.

It turns out the wooden box was filled with the CREMATED ASHES of their victim’s father. And now, I’d have to imagine, he’s HAUNTING these dudes.

The cops eventually tracked them down and just filed a bunch of felony charges against them.

17-year-old Devin Gesell is being tried as an adult . . . the 16-year-old and 15-year-old guys who were with him are being tried as juveniles.

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Freak Files: Tuesday, 4/28/15

Animal Rescue!

A Louisiana fireman used his cell phone to rescue six ducklings trapped in a storm drain.

Residents of St. Tammany Parish spotted the baby ducks falling down the drain, so they called police. Firefighter CODY KNECHT used a realistic duck quack ringtone on his phone to summon the ducklings out. All six ducklings were eventually reunited with their mother.

It was fire station’s second duck rescue this month. On April 19th, firefighters rescued a duck from a chimney.


Stupid Criminals!!!

JOHN MAGUIRE must have REALLY needed the money when he tried to steal a live 11 thousand volt electrical cable.

Turns out Maguire stuck a tester into the wire to see if it was live. It was live alright, throwing him across the room and burning his hands. The other problem was, he killed the power to a good portion of the Scottish town of Leven.

Maguire would have gotten away but the police appealed to the public to help find the culprit by being on the lookout for a man with horrific burns to his hands that would appear black and red.

The description worked, and with more than a dozen phone calls to the police station, the police were able to find Maguire, just as they described: a man with horrific burns to his hands that would appear black and red.

Stupid Criminals!!!

He was arrested and released on bail until his sentencing next month.


Airplane Janitor Stole Nearly 1,500 Mini Liquor Bottles

A woman employed as an airplane janitor in New York City was arraigned on charges she stole nearly 1,500 mini-bottles of liquor and more than two dozen electronic devices from American Airlines planes over 3 years.

Among the items found in 48-year old Juanette Cullum’s home were 7 iPads, 19 Kindles, 2 laptop computers and 1,429 mini bottles of alcohol.

She could face up to seven years in prison if convicted.

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Freak Files: Friday, 4/24/15

Looking for Love In All The Wrong Places

IBRAHIM AHMAD was suspended from La Center High School in Washington State Wednesday for strapping a fake bomb around his waist before asking a girl to the prom.

Ahmad says he was just being “creative” because he felt pressure to “go all out” to get the girl’s attention. He explains, “It’s kind of a trending thing now, too, where everyone just asks in a really creative way.”

The girl said “Yes”, but it doesn’t matter because Ahmad has been suspended for five-days and won’t be allowed to attend the prom this Saturday night.


This Cop Is a Dog Lover

An eye for an eye isn’t the law of the land, but sometimes it seems like it should be.

A policeman in Ohio made a woman sit inside her hot car after he was called to a scene and found she locked her dog in it. Instead of just issuing a citation and letting her go, he made her sit in her own hot car so she could feel what her dog did.

He finally let her out and issued her a warning. Thankfully the dog is fine.


Doctors Used Skin from a Guy’s Forearm to Rebuild His Tongue, and Now He Has to Shave It

A 48-year-old in England named David Billings went to the doctor about a year and-a-half ago when he had trouble swallowing, and they found a cancerous tumor on the right side of his tongue.

Luckily they were able to remove it before the cancer spread. But then he had trouble talking, because an inch-and-a-half section of his tongue was missing. So a surgeon rebuilt it using a skin graft from his left forearm. This worked. That part of his tongue is still numb, and he doesn’t have taste buds there, but he can talk again.

He does have to deal with one weird side effect though. The skin from his arm still grows HAIR, so he has to SHAVE his tongue now. He says it doesn’t bother him too much, and his wife doesn’t seem to notice the hair when they kiss. So he’s going au naturel for now.

Click here to see a photo of his arm here. Sadly, he hasn’t shared a picture of his tongue.

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Freak Files: Thursday, 4-23-15

A Woman Gets Revenge on Her Cheating Boyfriend by Drowning All of His Apple Products in the Bathtub

Last week, she found out her boyfriend was cheating on her, so she got some hardcore revenge . . . she filled up their bathtub and dumped ALL of his Apple products in.

And as we’ve ALL learned the hard way, water and electronics don’t mix . . . especially delicate electronics like all the stuff Apple makes. She posted two photos of her work on Twitter and it looks like her boyfriend was a serious Apple addict.

I spotted an iMac, two MacBook Pros, two or three iPhones, two or three iPads, two or three iPad minis, and an Airport Extreme. It’s got to be around $10,000 worth of damage, maybe even more.

Her tweet has been retweeted more than 17,000 times but people seem pretty split about whether it’s ingenious revenge . . . or criminal. (Click here to see the photos.)


A Truck Driver Trades $50,000 Worth of Lunch Meat For Crack

45-year-old Larry Bowen of Mabelvale, Arkansas is a truck driver . . . and last June, he was hired to drive $50,000 worth of LUNCH MEAT to Alabama and Florida.

But the meat never made it. It turns out that as Larry was driving through Memphis, he stopped at a gas station, where he bumped into two guys selling CRACK. He made them a deal: ALL of his meat for some of their crack.

After the trucking company used a GPS to track down their truck, they found Larry at the gas station, eating a sandwich.

Stupid Criminals!!!

It’s not clear if he used lunch meat from the truck, or bought his own. Larry just pleaded guilty to theft and was sentenced to one year of drug rehab and six years of probation.


A Guy Was Rushed to the Hospital After He Tried to Give His Pet Snake a Kiss on the Mouth…and It Bit Him

Just because YOU love a random animal doesn’t mean it loves you back.

18-year-old Austin Hatfield of Wimauma, Florida captured a four-foot cottonmouth snake last week and decided to keep him as a pet. (Cottonmouths are also called water moccasins.)

He’s been keeping it in a pillowcase in his girlfriend’s house. Well . . . a few days ago, he was cuddling with his new pet and decided to give him a kiss on the mouth. And . . . it BIT him. Cottonmouths are venomous and can be pretty deadly . . . so Austin was rushed to the hospital in critical condition.

Fortunately, he pulled through and now he’s been upgraded to good condition. BUT, now we add insult to injury. You need a permit in Florida to catch and keep a cottonmouth snake . . . so Austin could be facing charges.

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Freak Files: Wednesday, 4/22/15

A Guy Shoots His Computer Eight Times After Fighting With It For Several Months

We’ve ALL had one of those moments when we wanted to punch our computer for running slow or crashing…but eventually it starts working again, and we reconcile. Not this guy.

38-year-old Lucas Hinch of Colorado Springs, Colorado says he and his Dell computer have been, quote, “fighting…for the last several months.” Their war finally ended on Monday night when Lucas took it out to a back alley, and unloaded his GUN on it.

He wound up putting eight bullets into the computer, which killed it. Unfortunately for him, other people heard the gunshots and called the cops. Lucas was arrested for discharging a firearm within city limits.

Click here to see a picture of Lucas and a pic of the computer filled with bullet holes.


A Convict Turns Himself In 40 Years After He Escaped Prison!

A guy who vanished from prison 40-years ago is finally back behind bars.

66-year-old DAVID MOORE escaped from a North Carolina prison three times back in the 70s. After his final escape, authorities couldn’t find him.

But, for some reason, after 40 years on the lamb, Moore picked up the phone Monday and called Kentucky police to turn himself in.

The detective who answered the call thought it was a joke at first. But, police did a little digging and found multiple arrest warrants for Moore. So, they went to his home, picked him up, and put him back where he belongs.


A Man Obsessed With Wearing Brand New Boxers Every Day Faces Bankruptcy

A man with the strange obsession of wearing a new pair of boxer shorts every day is now facing bankruptcy.

26-year-old Curt Almond, spends almost $60 a week on his obsession of never wearing the same underwear twice….and now, he is dead broke because of it.

He has had to file for bankruptcy and move back in with his mother….oh, and he now just washes his boxers instead of wearing a new pair each day.


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Freak Files: Tuesday, 4/21/15

When Animals Attack!

Never mind being careful of the criminal element, in Germany it’s the cows you need to watch out for!

Police were called in when a farmer reported that one of his cows had gotten out of it’s pasture. One officer came face to face with the bovine and it charged him. Thankfully he was wearing his bulletproof vest when the horn hit him and he credits that for saving his life, otherwise the cow’s horn would have impaled him.

A construction worker, two officers and two residents were injured trying to get the cow under control. Ultimately, a vet had to tranquilize the animal and a butcher took it from there.


A Drunk Driver Was Arrested After He Crashed Into a Beer Truck

This is a PERFECTLY fitting way for a drunk driver to go down.

48-year-old Bradley Deneen of Leesburg, Florida was VERY drunk on Thursday afternoon while he was driving around in his pickup truck. He stopped at a convenience store, and as he was backing out, he got into a crash. With . . . a BEER TRUCK.

That caught a bunch of people’s attention, and they blocked him in until the cops could get there.

They found a bottle of vodka on him . . . not beer. I guess that would’ve been too ironic.

He blew a .316 on the breathalyzer, which is almost four times the legal limit!!

Stupid Criminals!!!!.

He was arrested for a DUI.


A Woman With Agoraphobia Leaves Her Home For Just the Third Time in Ten Years . . . and Falls Into an Open Manhole

57-year-old Janet Faal is a grandmother from West Sussex, England, and she suffers from severe agoraphobia . . . that’s usually thought of as a fear of going outside.

It’s more like a fear of being in an uncomfortable environment . . . whether that’s open spaces OR crowded places . . . but whatever. Anyway, she was in rehab for it, and she REALLY needed it . . . because she’d only left the house TWO times in the past DECADE. So a few weeks ago, they had her step outside for just the third time in 10 years.

And . . . she promptly fell down an open MANHOLE. She wound up with a broken leg and two black eyes . . . and she says she may never leave the house again.

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Freak Files: Monday, 4/20/15

The Woman Who Won the St. Louis Marathon Cheated and Skipped the Whole Course — For

the Second Year in a Row

26-year-old Kendall Schler of Columbia, Missouri won the St. Louis marathon last weekend . . . which got her a $1,500 cash prize AND an entry into the Boston Marathon.

There’s just one problem: As the race officials were reviewing her run, they couldn’t find any sign of her during the race. It turns out she skipped the ENTIRE course and jumped in just before the finish line.

But it doesn’t stop there. Kendall finished in third in LAST year’s St. Louis marathon, so they decided to review that race too. And it turns out she did the exact same thing. She’s a serial marathon cheater!

So race officials stripped her of the title from this year, took away her entry to Boston, and banned her from future races.


A Guy Was Busted Robbing a Store Because His Ex’s Mother-in-Law Worked There

There are enough convenience stores around that you don’t have to rob the one where you KNOW the employees.

24-year-old Kyle Iveson of Lancashire, England busted into a convenience store on February 10th with a 12-inch knife, and told the clerk to give him all the money in the register. And the clerk was . . . 54-year-old Karen Brown, his ex’s mother-in-law.

And even though Kyle was wearing a mask during the robbery, Karen recognized him. Quote, “He’s one of those people who has a certain type of walk.” She gave him about $950 . . . then called the cops.

Stupid Criminals!!!

He was just sentenced to three years in prison.

Click here to see pictures of him and Karen, plus a few security shots from the robbery.


Firefighters Heard Voices Yelling “Help” Inside a Burning House . . . and It Turns Out to be Two Parrots

Firefighters in Middleton, Idaho got a call on Friday night about a house on fire.

When they got there, they could hear voices from inside yelling, “Help!” So they immediately went into rescue mode, and busted in to save the people trapped inside. Only they weren’t people . . . the voices belonged to two PARROTS.

The firefighters took them outside, gave them oxygen, and they’re both going to be okay. Fortunately, beyond the parrots, there weren’t any actual PEOPLE inside the house.

But you have to wonder if their ability to talk saved their lives. Their cries for help motivated the

Firefighters to bust in . . . a dog or cat couldn’t have done that. The firefighters put out the fire, and now they’re investigating how it started.

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Freak Files: Friday, 5/17/15

It’s Time For “Bizarre Things Found In Animals Stomachs”

There is an annual competition called “They Ate What?” where pet owners compete to win prizes for some of the bizarre things their pets ate, and this year, there some pretty crazy things found inside the stomachs of pets.

A 2-year-old pit bull managed to eat metal chains, an opened switch-blade, a pack of cigarettes, and more (and he lived through it….but he wasn’t the winner). The Winner was a small frog that ate 30 rocks from his enclosure.

A vet had to operate on him and he is doing fine.


Robber Gets Caught Because of His Crocs!

This REALLY serves this guy right for wearing Crocs to important events.

21-year-old Roland Grace of Fairbanks, Alaska broke into a restaurant a few weeks ago, and

stole about $400 from the cash register. But police found some clear footprints at the scene . . .

and they were from a pair of CROCS.

They brought in a bunch of suspects to interview, including Roland, and when he showed up at

the station . . . he was wearing the SAME pair of Crocs. The cops matched Roland’s Crocs with the footprint and. . . . . Stupid Criminals!!!!

Roland admitted to the burglary. So he was arrested . . . and charged with a few other local burglaries too.


Woman Shoots Her Television Because Her Kids Watched Too Much TV

A mother in Illinois wanted her kids to watch less TV….so she did what any reasonable parent would do: she broke-out her rifle and shot-out her 50-inch flat screen TV!!!

Needless to say, she was arrested and charged with reckless discharge of a firearm, unlawful possession of a firearm without a license and 3 counts of endangering the health and safety of a child.

Stupid Criminals!!!

The kids were placed in the care of another relative.

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Freak Files: Thursday, 4/16/15

A Company Created a Robot That Can Cook 2,000 Different Meals
A company in England just finished the prototype of a robot that can cook around 2,000 different meals. It’s actually pretty incredible.
You hook two big robot arms to your ceiling, lay out the ingredients, and they do the rest . . . INCLUDING the dishes. When you’re not using the robot, the arms tuck up into the ceiling.
It should go on sale by 2017 . . . for around $14,000. But the price includes a special oven, stove, dishwasher, and sink that are all compatible with the robot.

Stupid Criminals!!!
CHRIS WATSON OF Phoenix is under arrest after a massive theft from WalMart.
Police say Watson backed his pickup truck up to the car battery cage at Walmart, took a bolt cutters out of his truck, snipped the lock and started to load up. When all was said and done, he stole 76 car batteries.
But Watson is a Stupid Criminal and luck wasn’t on his side. He sped away from the robbery but pulled over to remove the cover over his license plate so he didn’t get stopped for it. Instead, a nearby cop thought that anyone who covers their license plate was up to no good, so he pulled him over and discovered the stolen batteries.
Stupid Criminals!!!

Stupid People
SCOTT KEMERY needs to go back to science class. And he needs to quit smoking!
Long Island police say Kemery tried to kill bed bugs in a rental car with rubbing alcohol. He poured it all over the seats and then he decided to take a smoke break. So he sat down in the car and, yes, he lit a cigarette.
That’s when the fire started, damaging two other cars. Kemery was able to escape the vehicle on his own, but suffered second-degree burns in the incident.

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Freak Files: Wednesday, 4/15/15

Too Much Money On My Hands!

Apparently anyone with money can be a cop in Oklahoma.

BOB BATES, who’s 73, is a wealthy insurance executive in Tulsa and has given the police department there money to buy all sorts of needed equipment. In exchange, Bates gets to go on ride-alongs, carry a gun, wear a uniform, the whole shebang.

He took part in the pursuit of ERIC HARRIS, an alleged drug and weapons dealer. When Bates finally caught up to Harris, he was already being restrained by other officers. Bates pulled out what he thought was his Taser, but was actually his gun, and fired, shooting Harris.

In the video, Bates can be overheard saying, “Oh I shot him. I’m sorry.” The Tulsa Sheriff’s Department is NOT holding Mr. Bates responsible for his actions and but the District Attorney’s office is planning on charging him with manslaughter.


A Window-Washer Falls 11 Stories And Gets Sued For Landing On Someone’s Car

A window-washer in San Francisco survived a fall of 11 stories (that’s over 100 feet) onto the roof of a moving vehicle…and now he’s being sued by the driver!

The driver claims that he was injured when the window-washer fell on his car and the injury forced him to miss work.

He claims that the window-washer and the company he works for were “negligent in the operation of the window washing equipment.” No word yet on when this will go to trial.


Seattle CEO Raises “Minimum Wage” For His Company To $70k Per Year

A Seattle-based company will pay a $70,000 minimum wage to all employees, regardless of their job title!!!

Dan Price, founder and CEO of “Gravity Payments,” a credit card payment-processing firm, stunned his employees with the generous minimum wage plan, which will increase salaries over the next 3 years.

30 of the company’s 120 employees will see their salaries double over the next 3 years, while the CEO himself will take a pay cut from $1 million down to $70,000 a year….or minimum wage by his standards.

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