Mike and Mandy In The Morning!

THE LARGEST SQUID EVER CAUGHT IS BEING THAWED OUT…AND YOU CAN WATCH IT ON THE INTERWEB:
Last year, we told you about some fisherman off the coast of Antarctica who dragged in the largest squid ever caught.  This squid is 33 feet long and weighs a SUMPTUOUS 1,089 POUNDS.  For over a year now, the squid’s been frozen.  But scientists in New Zealand are now thawing it out so they can begin studying it.  According to Steve O’Shea, a squid expert in New Zealand, if you used this squid’s tentacles to make calamari rings, they’d each be the size of TRACTOR TIRES. Giant squids are killing machines.  They stalk large fish, dig their tentacles into the body, and start eating the fish while it’s still alive.  Squid also eat each other.

AN OLD MAN DIES FROM A HEART ATTACK…AND PINS HIS WIFE’S LEG BENEATH HIS DEAD BODY:
Last Wednesday, a 77-year-old man in Marion, Illinois had a heart attack and died in his house.  That wasn’t the worst of it though.  When he collapsed, he fell on top of his 84-year-old wife and her leg got pinned underneath him.  She just didn’t have the strength to get from under his body.  Fortunately, the newspaper delivery guy noticed the papers piling up and checked on them on Sunday.  The wife is going to be OK.

IS IRAN AFRAID OF BARBIE AND HARRY POTTER???
According to a recent poll, Americans consider Iran to be Public Enemy number one.  And last week, HILLARY CLINTON said that if Iran attacked Israel, we would, quote, “totally obliterate” them.  But annihilation doesn’t seem to have Iranians all that worried.  No, what’s got Iranian leaders really freaked out is Barbie, Spiderman and Harry Potter.  Apparently, there’s a pretty serious black market in Iran for Western toys and Iranian officials are worried that the flood of Western influences is negatively affecting the nation’s culture…and they’re concerned future generations will be irreparably damaged because of it.  As it stands, Western toys aren’t technically banned in Iran…but buying and owning them is heavily discouraged.

A BUNCH OF PEOPLE ARE CALLING IN SICK TODAY…SO THEY CAN PLAY “GRAND THEFT AUTO 4″???
When you get to work this morning, I want you to do something:  Look around and see if anyone’s missing from the office.  If someone’s gone, there’s a decent chance they’re at home…playing a video game.  That’s right, a video game.  See, at midnight last night, the fourth installment of the popular “Grand Theft Auto” video game series went on sale…and a bunch of gamers lined up outside stores so they could buy the thing the moment it went on sale.  (If you don’t know what “Grand Theft Auto” is…basically, it’s an ultra-violent video game where you go around stealing cars, shooting people and picking up  prostitutes.)  According to a gaming website called Play.com…40% of those people were planning on calling in sick today just so they could sit at home and play this nonsense/game all day.  (So you know, “Grand Theft Auto (Four)” is expected to do $400 MILLION in sales just this week.)

PEOPLE ARE MORE LIKELY TO LAUGH AT YOUR JOKE IF YOU TELL IT TO THEM IN THEIR LEFT EAR:
It’s time for today’s human anatomy lesson.  Today we’re focusing on the brain.  In case you don’t know, your brain has two hemispheres (–or halves):  The RIGHT and the LEFT.  The LEFT hemisphere controls logic-based tasks, like algebra…and the RIGHT hemisphere controls emotional and imaginative tasks, like painting a picture.  And if that’s not confusing enough…the RIGHT side of your brain controls the LEFT side of your body, and the LEFT side of your brain controls the RIGHT side of your body.  Still with me?  Good.  Research has found that the RIGHT hemisphere is more involved in processing jokes and punch lines because most jokes require you to use your imagination.  That means you’re more likely to laugh at a joke you hear in your LEFT ear.

COULD GAS PRICES REACH $10 A GALLON
Think gas prices can’t possibly get any higher?  Well, you’d be wrong.  According to some economic forecasters, gas prices could go as high as $10 per gallon…within the next TWO or THREE years.  So why should you care what a couple of stupid economic forecasters have to say about the price of oil?  Well, they’re the same guys who forecasted today’s gas prices.  Alan Gaines is the chairman of Dune Energy…which is an oil, gas and coal company in Houston.  A little over a year ago, he predicted that gas prices would be right around $4 a gallon now…which seemed like an extreme projection at the time.  Alan says that, according to economic trends, gas prices are likely to increase by 40% to 50% in the next few years…and they could increase by even more…before eventually topping out around $8 to $10 a gallon.

ARE PICTURES OF MILEY CYRUS AND HER DAD MORE DISTURBING THAN THE NOW-INFAMOUS FAKE-TOPLESS SHOT???
Everybody is still talking about that fake-topless picture of 15-year-old MILEY CYRUS, that was taken by photographer Annie Liebovitz for “Vanity Fair” magazine.  But Miley also posed for some pictures with her dad, BILLY RAY CYRUS…and some people think they’re even MORE provocative.  You can count KATHIE LEE GIFFORD among them.  Yesterday on the “Today” show, Kathie Lee said she found the pictures of Miley and Billy Ray more disturbing than the topless shot…adding that she would NEVER have posed like that with her father.  Here are those pictures….

WILL “AMERICAN IDOL” CUT THEIR “AUDITIONS PHASE”???
“American Idol” is suffering through its first major ratings decline in its seven-season run…and last Wednesday’s results show was the lowest-rated episode in five years.  It’s not an emergency, since “Idol” is still, by far, the most-watched show on TV.  But just in case the “Idol” format is becoming stale and / or annoying, Fox and the show’s producers are brainstorming some possible improvements to keep it fresh. One of those ideas may be to cut out the weeks of long, drawn-out audition shows.  Instead, the season would begin with the Hollywood round…and they’d show audition footage here and there until the actual, live competition started.

ARE MARIAH CAREY AND NICK CANNON ENGAGED???
MARIAH CAREY showed up at New York City’s Tribeca Film Festival over the weekend with boyfriend NICK CANNON…and what looked like an ENGAGEMENT RING.  Her reps won’t say if it really was.  (–Here’s a picture of the ring . . .)

Being the president of the United States is arguably the MOST stressful job in the world . . . and if you’ve seen some “before and after” pictures of the last few presidents, it’s pretty apparent the stress took its toll on their youthful good looks. So that begs the question:  How might THESE candidates look after four years in office?  Well we got our hands on some digitally aged pictures of JOHN MCCAIN, BARACK OBAMA and HILLARY CLINTON to see what four stressful years in office might do to their appearance.

You can contact Tina Michelle online at www.tinamichelle.com or via the phone at 740-377-3022

A WOMAN HAS HER BELLY SURGICALLY REMOVED:

There’s a woman from Russia named Natalya, who recently had a surgical procedure similar to liposuction to remove fat from her stomach.  But what’s remarkable is that in just ONE operation, doctors lopped off 125 POUNDS of fat…from Natalya’s belly ALONE.  See, Natalya started gaining weight when she was 13 because of a hormonal imbalance…and for some reason, the fat collected almost exclusively in her belly.  Natalya tried dieting and has seen hundreds of doctors…but she just kept on gaining weight.  It got to the point that Natalya’s belly hung almost to her ankles, making it impossible for her to even walk.  Finally, Natalya decided to have the fat surgically removed…and recently, doctors cut 125 pounds of fat from her belly (–which is the weight of some full-grown adults). To see the picture of Nataly’s belly fat, click here.

40% OF HIGH SCHOOL SENIORS DON’T UNDERSTAND SEVENTH GRADE MATH:

Just a reminder:  Our kids are kind of dumb.  According to a new survey (from a public awareness campaign called Strong American Schools)…40% of high school seniors don’t understand the math they were taught in seventh and eighth grade.  And here are some stats from another frightening study that came out earlier this year by a group called Common Core…Over 50% of high school kids don’t know which century the American Civil War took place in…and 33% don’t know that the Bill of Rights guarantees free speech.

WEIGHTLIFTERS ARE MORE LIKELY TO GO BALD:

Researchers in the U.K. found that guys who spend 45 minutes in the weight room at least three days a week are more likely to go bald…because the surge of testosterone you get from weight lifting actually thins out your hair.

DRUNK AT THE SUPERMARKET

I was shopping at the local super market where I selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk,
A carton of eggs,
A quart of orange juice ,
A head of romaine lettuce,
A 2 lb. can of coffee, and
A 1 lb. package of bacon .

As I was unloading my items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind me watched as I placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up the purchases, the drunk calmly stated, ‘You must be single.

I was a bit startled by this proclamation, but I was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since I was indeed single.

I looked at the six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about my selections that could have tipped off the drunk to my marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of me, I said: ‘ Well, you know what, you’re absolutely right.  But how on earth did you know that? ‘

The drunk replied, ” Cause you’re ugly.

MILEY CYRUS IS APOLOGIZING FOR SOME RACY PICTURES
MILEY CYRUS has issued an apology for some racy pictures of her that have shown up online over the past week.  As you may have heard, some personal photos surfaced first.  In one of them, Miley is lying on a couch, draped over the lap of her then-boyfriend, who was her producer’s son.  She’s pulling up her shirt to expose her midriff. (–We chose NOT to show those pictures when they came out because while everyone SAYS they’re against that kind of thing,  the moment the pictures come out EVERYBODY’S PASSING THEM AROUND.  And while they’re passing them around, they comment about how horrible it is that everybody’s passing them around.) Over the weekend, another picture started making the rounds.  This one was from an actual photo shoot that Miley did for “Vanity Fair” magazine.  It was done by world-famous photographer ANNIE LIEBOVITZ…and it makes Miley look like she’s TOPLESS. (–Again, we’re not going to show the picture.) Here’s what Miley Cyrus had to say about the whole controversy…”My goal in my music and my acting is always to make people happy.  For ‘Vanity Fair’, I was so honored and thrilled to work with Annie.  “I took part in a photo shoot that was supposed to be ‘artistic’ and now, seeing the photographs and reading the story, I feel so embarrassed.  I never intended for any of this to happen and I am truly sorry if I have disappointed anyone.”

MARIAH CAREY HAD A TROUBLED PERFORMANCE ON “GOOD MORNING AMERICA”:

On Friday, MARIAH CAREY performed several songs on “Good Morning America”…and it didn’t go all that smoothly.  Things got off to a rough start during her performance of “Touch My Body”, when the song’s back-up track started too soon.  Mariah…who WAS singing over the track…tried to catch up and make it work until a sound tech was able to fix it. Then, in the middle of the song, one of Mariah’s back-up singers starts singing HER part…and Mariah turned to her, and sang, quote, “Stop singing my part now, baby.”  To see the video, click here.

JENNIFER ANISTON…IS JOHN MAYER HER LATEST???
JENNIFER ANISTON and JOHN MAYER might be an item!  The two of them had lunch and dinner together this past Friday in Miami…where Jennifer is shooting the movie “Marley and Me” with OWEN WILSON.After leaving dinner at around 1:00 A.M., they headed to Jennifer’s hotel…holding hands.  (–The “National Enquirer” claims that SHERYL CROW set them up.)

THE LATEST CASUALTY OF CLIMATE CHANGE
By now, you might’ve heard a thing or two about climate change…and how if we don’t get our heads out of our backsides and stop polluting, the planet’s going to revolt and kill us all.  Here’s their logic…As we continue to hemorrhage carbon dioxide into the atmosphere, the global temperature rises…and when THAT happens, there are radical shifts in weather patterns.  These shifts cause floods, droughts and other weather-related catastrophes. All of these things make it more difficult to grow crops like barley and hops, which are needed to make BEER!!!…and the supply suffers.  Since there are less of these ingredients to go around…the price goes UP.  And beer manufacturers pass that price increase on to YOU.  According to some brewmasters, beer prices are already up by about 10 to 15%…and they could eventually increase by as much as 200% in the next few years.  (This is so much more than a Freak File.  It’s a tragedy!!!)

A GUY ATTACKS HIS DAD WITH A MACHETE
I’m all for families bonding over a board game or dinner or something…but if your idea of family-bonding involves drinking excessive amounts of beer together…you’re just asking for problems…Like this guy in Guam.  His name is Jay Walker and he was hanging out with his dad, Jake…enjoying the day, pounding down some brews.  But, when it came down to the last can of beer…they couldn’t decide who should get it.  Well, Jay wanted that last beer so bad that he was willing to fight for it.  So he busted out a MACHETE and started swinging it at his dad.  When the cops showed up, Jay was drunk out of his skull…and they booked him on charges of family violence and assault.  Luckily, his dad wasn’t injured.

STEPHEN HAWKING SAYS THERE *ARE* ALIENS ON OTHER PLANETS:
On Monday, world-renowned astrophysicist and all-around genius STEPHEN HAWKING (–you know, the guy in the wheelchair who talks through a robotic voice box) said it’s LIKELY there are aliens on other planets. But according to Hawking, any aliens that might be out there are probably pretty primitive…because intelligent life is extremely rare.  Actually, it’s SO rare that Hawking says, quote, “Some would say it has yet to occur on Earth.”

So, in support of the “March of Dimes” and their “March for Babies”, I walked 5 miles during our show this morning.  Oh boy.  Didn’t think I’d make it.  But I did.  And….my total for the March of Dimes is now over $1900!!!  Hot dog!  Surpassed my goal!!  I cannot tell you how much I appreciate ALL of you that donated.  With the economy being as bad as it is, it really was amazing to see the generosity of WRVR listeners.

Now, don’t get me wrong.  I am THRILLED to have made the goal.  But…..it kinda screwed up my whole idea for today’s blog entry.  You see, I was going to post this picture of Allie pouting….pouting for donations….
Oh well….$1900 for the March of Dimes is better than a funny blog.

That little pout is becoming a common visitor in our house.  Mostly, it’s her secret weapon when she wants attention.  Turns out that she is a lot more like me than we may have thought.  She just LOVES being the center of attention.  Look at me!!!  I am playing with a rattle!!  Look at me!!!  I am trying to find my thumb so I can suck it and tick-off my Mom!!!

Well, at least I outgrew that.  Right?  <hides>

Here’s a picture of Miss Allie “talking” to her dad.  :)

Oh, and Monday is Allie’s first day with her nanny.  I don’t even want to talk about it. It just makes me nervous.  Scared.  Worried.  I feel like I am failing her by putting her in a day-care system.  But, it’s something that just has to be done.  I rationalize it by telling myself that she will have a much better life in the future if we have a dual-income household.  Man, everybody warned me about a lack of sleep and stinky diapers, but nobody warned me about how hard her first day of “nanny-care” was going to be.

Meanwhile, I was reflecting on how much Allie has grown over the past three months….it is amazing.  With all the problems poor Allie has endured, and the roadblocks she has yet to face…I am just so proud to see how she’s come along.  Here, just look at the difference in these pictures.

Birthday

Homecoming Day…

One Month…

2 months

3 months

THE LIE DETECTOR

John was a salesman’s delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick.  His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change.

One day, John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector.

It was just about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 11 year old son returned home from school.  Tommy was over 2 hours late.

“Where have you been?  Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?”, they asked.

“Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project” said Tommy.

The Robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair.

“Son, this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you went after school.”

“We went to Bobby’s house and watched a movie.”

“I’m ashamed of you Son,” said John. “When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.”

The robot then walked around to John and delivered a roundhouse right that nearly knocked him out of his chair.

Marsha was bent double laughing, almost in tears. “Boy, did you ever ask for that one!  And you can’t be too mad with Tommy.  After all, he is your son!”

The Robot immediately walked around to Marsha, and slapped her three times.

WESLEY SNIPES GOT THE MAXIMUM SENTENCE
WESLEY SNIPES got the MAXIMUM PUNISHMENT for not paying his taxes:  Three years in prison.  He was not locked up immediately.  He’ll turn himself in at a later date.  That’s one year for each of the three counts of failing to file a tax return.  Even though the sentence seems pretty stiff, Wesley got off relatively easy.  He had also been charged with two felonies…conspiracy to defraud the government and filing a false claim for a $7 million return.  But he was acquitted of those charges.  On his way out of the courtroom, Snipes was asked by a reporter if he had anything to say.  He spread his arms and said, quote, “Like what?”

TOM CRUISE IS COMING BACK TO “OPRAH”:
TOM CRUISE will be returning to “The Oprah Winfrey Show” for the first time since his…uh…rather ENTHUSIASTIC couch-jumping appearance back in June of 2005.  It’ll air in two parts during May Sweeps.  Tom will be in the studio, but there will also be pre-taped segments from Tom’s Colorado home.  Tom will be celebrating the 25th anniversary of his breakout role in 1983′s “Risky Business”.

OJ HAS ALREADY BEEN FIRED!!!
Contrary to the rumors, O.J. SIMPSON will NOT be on the second season of “Celebrity Apprentice”.  O.J. DID ask, and DONALD TRUMP may actually have not been immediately against the idea.  A so-called “source close to the show” tells “OK!” magazine, quote, “Donald Trump was big on the idea for a few minutes…but NBC didn’t even consider it!”

THE U.S. ONLY MAKES UP 5% OF THE WORLD’S POPULATION…BUT WE’RE RESPONSIBLE FOR 20% OF THE WORLD’S PRISONERS:
The U.S. only makes up 5% of the entire world’s population…BUT we’re responsible for 20% of ALL the prisoners in the world.  Our 2.3 MILLION prisoners are by far the most out of any other country.  We have 700,000 more prisoners than China…even though China has a population that is FOUR TIMES bigger than ours.  Experts at the International Center for Prison Studies at King’s College London think the reason that the U.S. has so many prisoners is because we imprison people for non-violent crimes like doing drugs or writing bad checks . . .Those types of crimes wouldn’t get you a prison sentence in many other countries.  So, which country has the LOWEST prison population?  That would be the Republic of San Marino.  Its population is 30,000…and get this…there’s only one prisoner.  ONE.
(All this really proves is that we have a higher standard of living in America, higher than any other place in the world!)

MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL IS BANNING…WATER???
Next time you’re watching a Major League Baseball game on TV, see if you notice any of the players drinking bottled water in the dugout.  Apparently, Major League Baseball has an official rule that PROHIBITS drinking bottled water in the dugout.  That’s because Gatorade is the official “sports drink” of major league baseball and the league states that no player should be seen drinking anything BUT Gatorade in the dugout.  (–That’s according to sportswriter Ed Price, who covers the Yankees for New Jersey’s “Star Ledger” newspaper.  He noticed a sign in the visitors dugout at the White Sox stadium which said “NO BOTTLED WATER ON THE BENCH” .  In fact, he was told that players can’t even drink Aquafina, which is the official bottled water of Major League Baseball.)  (NJ.com)

A GIRL HAS A FACIAL TUMOR…THAT WEIGHS 16 POUNDS!!!
Next week, doctors at the University of Miami and Jackson Memorial Medical Center are going to perform a charitable surgery on a 15-year-old girl with a bizarre facial tumor.  Her name is Lai Thi Dao and she lives in Vietnam.  Back when she was three years old, she developed a cyst on her tongue.  Even though this cyst could have been removed for little money, her parents were poor…so they let it go.  But over time the cyst kept growing.  Now, 12 years later…it’s turned into a tumor that weighs 16 POUNDS.  The tumor has gotten so bad that Lai has problems walking, eating and breathing.  If she doesn’t get the tumor removed, Lai could die within six months.  It’s going to cost $107,000 and it will take 10 hours to remove the tumor.  But, luckily, once the surgery is done, Lai should live a normal life.

GOOD NEWS – BAD NEWS

During one airline flight, the Captain left the cockpit to announce to the passengers that he had bad news and good news.

A man in the front row said “For goodness sake, what’s the bad news?”

The pilot answered, “We’ve lost two engines and we’re going to crash”.

“For Heaven’s sake, what’s the GOOD news?”, replied the passenger.

Answered the Captain, “We are ON TIME!”

It’s hard to believe that just a few months ago, Allie was this tiny.

Many of you who read this blog have followed Allie’s story from the day she was born. (If you are new to the blog and would like to catch up on how bad things were at first, you can click here.)  I am a firm believer that Alana would not be here with us today had it not been for the March of Dimes.

The March of Dimes does a lot of research into the causes and recovery of Premature babies. Alana was given a drug that helped her lungs to develop since she was born so early.  This was a very large factor in WHY Allie is here with us today.  The March of Dimes is responsible for that life-saving treatment.

But, they don’t just help preemies.  They help ALL babies.  They were even responsible for the life-saving research and cure for Polio.

Every year the March of Dimes has a walk in honor of Premature Babies. It’s called March for Babies.  This year, the Memphis walk is just under 5 miles long.  Seeing as how I am NOT the athletic type, a 5 mile walk is something that will be very hard for me to do.  But, I am doing it.  Why?  Because of Allie.

I want to know that if Allie ever has a child, and that child is premature…it will have an even BETTER chance of survival than she did. I know that the March of Dimes can make that happen.

So, I am lacing up my running shoes and starting my training now.  I will be walking in this year’s event.  I’d love to have your support.

You can make a donation online at:  http://www.marchforbabies.org/MandyMorgan.

Or, you can walk yourself!  You can register online at www.marchforbabies.org.

Together we can make a difference for the future of all babies.  Allie thanks you in advance. :)

ROY SCHEIDER IS DONATING TO BARACK OBAMA . . . FROM BEYOND THE GRAVE:
BARACK OBAMA got a $50 donation from “Jaws” star ROY SCHEIDER on March 10th.  The thing is, Roy Scheider died on February 10th.  Apparently, Roy had it set up to make monthly credit card donations to Obama’s campaign.  When informed of the donation, an Obama spokesman said the campaign would stop taking money from the dead.  Or at least, this ONE dead guy.

DONALD TRUPMP’S “CELBRITY APPRENTICE” MUST BE DESPERATE
The next season of DONALD TRUMP’S desperate “Celebrity Apprentice” experiment could feature…O.J. SIMPSON.  For real.  According to the “New York Post”, O.J. has already asked Trump if he’d bring him aboard.  NBC and Trump are reportedly “thinking about it”.  A source says, quote, “[They're] being very cautious.  There’s a certain amount of heat associated with Simpson.”

THE BEAR THAT WILL FERRELL WRESTLED IN “SEMI-PRO” KILLED ITS TRAINER ON TUESDAY:
Don’t be surprised if WILL FERRELL feels like he’s LUCKY TO BE ALIVE today.  Remember that grizzly bear he wrestled in his latest movie, “Semi-Pro”???  Well, on Tuesday, that bear KILLED HIS TRAINER.  The bear’s name is Rocky.  He’s 5 years old, seven and a half feet tall, and 700 POUNDS.  His trainer, 39-year-old Stephan Miller, was putting him through obedience exercises at the Predators in Action wild animal training center in Big Bear, California.  (–For real.)  It’s not clear why, but Rocky chomped down on Stephan’s neck and killed him.  Fellow trainers had to pepper-spray Rocky to subdue him.  Authorities have not yet decided whether to have Rocky put down.

If you wear glasses, you can now look just as stylish as “American Idol” judge RANDY JACKSON . . . no matter how big your head is.  Randy is now pimping a new set of eyeglass frames for men, like him, with OVERSIDED HEADS??.  And they’re a huge hit.  One retailer says, quote, “[They] really filled a void.  They are so in demand that the only prescription frames harder to get right now are Chanel.”

YOUR CAR’S “IMPROVED” SAFETY FEATURES MIGHT ACTUALLY MAKE IT MORE DANGEROUS IF YOU SURVIVE AN ACCIDENT:
Studies have shown that a lot of people use safety ratings to help them decide which car to buy.  But it turns out the very same features that make your car SAFER in an accident…might make it more DANGEROUS if you need to be rescued from the wreckage.  Let’s say you get into a bad car crash.  There’s a decent chance that your car’s airbag, shatterproof windshield and reinforced steel frame are going to save your life.  But if your car catches on fire, and you’re unconscious…those same safety features make it harder for rescue workers to remove you from your car.  Some new car frames are SO strong that rescue workers’ tools can’t cut through the metal.  And even if workers ARE able to get inside the car…an unfired airbag could suddenly go off.  The force of an air bag deploying can kill you AND your rescuer.  Fortunately, many fire departments are developing new techniques and technology to help safely remove victims from their cars.

WASHINGTON REDSKINS OUTSOURCED THEIR CHEERLEADERS TO INDIA
Every time you call up tech support, you probably talk to some outsourced person in India.  Well, now India is turning the tables on America and outsourcing from us.  And what they need in India is some hot, scantly clad, pom-pom-shaking cheerleaders.  Last weekend, the Indian Premier League…which is the world’s most expensive cricket tournament…made its debut.  To give the $1.5 MILLION pre-game show a bit more sex appeal, they hired…the Washington Redskins cheerleaders.  There are 11 cheerleaders and they’re going to stay in India for a bit and show their moves to a group of Indian women who will eventually take over the job.  That squad will actually be the country’s first ever home-grown, all-Indian cheerleading group.

WORLD’S YOUNGEST COLLEGE PROFESSOR
Last February, Alia Sabur of Long Island, New York, was hired by Konkuk University in Seoul, South Korea, to teach a course in cell science.  That information alone isn’t very interesting.  What IS interesting is the fact that Alia is only 18 years old…and according to the “Guinness Book of World Records”…that makes her the youngest professor EVER.  (The former youngest professor was 19-year-old Colin Maclaurin who was hired as a mathematics professor at the University of Aberdeen in Scotland in 1717.  Colin was a protégé of ISAAC NEWTON…and held the record for almost 300 years.)  When Alia was ten years old, it was already pretty clear that she was gifted.  So she skipped eight grade levels…and enrolled in college at SUNY Stony Brook.  (–In order to do this, you have to pass several equivalency tests…and be accepted, of course.)  Alia had her Bachelor’s degree by the time she was 14…and she got her Graduate degree from Drexel University a few years later.  Next month, Alia will officially start teaching at Konkuk University…where she’ll be even YOUNGER than some of her students.